A letter from July 31st, 2018

Peaceful right?

Hello. This night a year ago you were violently kicked out from your only safe place in this world and your heart broke. It was around this time you made that really obvious cut on your arm that no one even asked you about. Has the scar faded at all? It was a time filled with so much sadness and crying in public places and late nights trapped in cigarette smoke. This night right now you are filled with overwhelming sadness. The career you fought so hard for just a year ago is now something you can't wait to throw away. You couldn't keep your promise to quit smoking and you haven't gotten any healthier. You are feeling so alone right now and you are so scared of the future. Something snapped within you and nothing excites you anymore. I pray that all this has changed. Hopefully you are still surrounded by the people who mean the most to you. Are you finally doing something good for the ones who need it more? Have you fallen in love and maybe had your heart broken again? Have you travelled to new places and collected stories you will never stop sharing? You recently came back from a trip to Taiwan. I want to remind you of your last night there, when we sped up the mountain on motorbikes and drank coffee to the sounds of our own laughter. I hope life has been kind enough to bless you with more good memories like these, too many to count. I hope your parents are finally getting the retirement they so deserve in a place they love. Is Mama finally back home with her favourite breakfast, the farms and the wet market? Are your brothers doing alright for themselves? My wish for you now is that life does not torment you. That the ruts you find yourself in are shallow and you grow immensely as a person. If you are reading this, hopefully you are laughing at how the years between us has made the sad memories almost painless. I have no idea what I'm doing in life but maybe you do. That's all I need right now to keep going.

Epilogue

3 months later

Hello!

It's us again. Reading this made me smile, then made me cry again. I'm finding it very difficult to find the words to reply to this, but here it...

Eosg. .
.
Sltil gfrrerine all hrvehewic eerw neo no oruy hte ,to yuo rscsa rae ,arm rhee. I ndow a siltl leoepp heat eo,rrasmf eebn ilettl iohnuctg iev' utb krnobe my. I i atps reew tshi i nda mfro hte ,tosaml aerd rsgmbnaaires smtoeimes taht tub fo eahv yldia at ulcky fleniseg ttha i ssapeec am evah wno sa iotnp dn'idt hnet i ifel enkw so my to inkht hte are,l my hewn. Vte'ahn mosgi,kn msmnliyee ctu tqui it gtolauhh ndwo i ev'i. Eyftlsile ma cbeause teh my lignvi earliehht of si oevnnnmerti lnoy i ni ecyrrnutl. Iekl ceeixt elfi s'donet oems em litls nomreya nda sdy,a i flee. Opeh is mhet etr,ebt bad het llyuaus txne ysda ti eon tusj is dna lalc i dan. .
.
Doevm yaaw back n'dtid nad i omec. Gxeptncie taht, r'neetw i bymea you f,cuk tnkhi 'awsnt scuae. Duowl akent ttleil hawt nad rloussyei you amybe v'ei saw fi nmgico vhae 4 oyu sesl eher 4 a been htoes file aryes, wkne eas,ry. It dlan glaon dtilooaunnnci nad ywa, ot eht uyo of maed fo dan ni urnddseh eutr, dserma unofd meht sahep fedirns ovel eth daem pr,teyo of. Tocen,suir see myan os erew su sifrden dan 4 woh hte rtpi entw no edma nefrtdfei i ni met pu i so os tspa ew epleop all ycneertl ot ot aphpy with mnya ,roeepu a syre,a ni. Eldvo os rae we. Ot nsrope eht leov away and oyu ni evnia aws whit rgwon alkw lelf oot. Ondgi ew imksgon aesttrd cmhu nkiirndg oto and d,ewe lal het doulc dnfi rdsug. Lal onw thta qtiu vie'. Ubt rylale atth ti ,neslos hgoturh a i memitseos us ihws odgo i ptu wsa ernve kfuc. I goln ti i to a item back okot to etg w,on siltl am nda eosm ggutrlse yasd ehewr. Omrf fliteim,e eiv' eht pteacc hatt alts to elki csras a uhmc elft mcoe us lwil omce thta het srcsa on ot add. Srieea heyt teg lryeal to live whti eoph i. .
.
Lfle leif i,s up enve ptu hatt, ehliw yuo to oury wesn htiw het terid ouy ni terfa ovle osoenme druebil nad odog you ihtw lal. ,imh who rsreueta so ni t,ho het own ladi uyo dlkei eht oyu fnudo htta olrdw or smot oerspn si mnmote owsmohe on one mofr ,rtanhoe uoy nfkicug ysee nma teh you. I,tanrlehipos oanterh a golan oen gdoo meth ganniwt you henw e'rewnt e'hs t,mei tsih tub you priomse aepepdhn i ,gaani fo meca oen ti a. Tleran my su for i ,ssonle. Nhkit aerrntp hmi a i nad oundl'ct orf vahe wlle' i sith ettbre tmie kdaes peke. .
.
Hre aglhu dlchoihdo ,dcelepar eiertr oru so ot dan extn ggoin 'dads dostne' adn she esll eden hhcwi nierpetgdn umsm' dnot' aoubt to enke set i yrc im' eray mhoe,. Ecma s,iivt wenh tmhe yeht rfo ago hetre mtnoh a adn i adn thob esart a did lteaghru asw ese. Of athw ofmr glhuhota in thebrosr iwth enes ldrwo i aomtsl ,rhae easry 3 'atenvh i estta ear thme ghiralt teh het the. Tguhho lli' onos be heom. .
.
Eifl su ahs entdtmroe. Att'hs aratdcmi shgnti ee'wr myltnale tub aesy ye,oainltlom nda ,leoepp atve'hn ont okya and alsyaw nbee. Galon swlo het a erno,ps os nrgow uor hshig had yaw sa and adn iehsthg cuhm ewev' eoswlt. Veldi we uaclyalt. Slao fiel us godo ,flul bnee to ahs dna. Ton psuynrlgirsi, lot het smei,rome tedasunndr ear i etterb dsa but as,lspein wno a eht cahe. Vaeh 'eewr tslil eyingojn tbu 'mi whta ino,dg ihts iade semsiotme on ynwaay i. ,lphe tlo hogsnico and a ,nwo go a and rtp,yeo ofr em,it a fo eht ti ist' sadrme a of hpat wdon 'mi here hreet rtefuu ubt fo aetnk in ldna dan to is bit. Esbt eoanl elef part teh ew rlogne no is,. .

This user has written an update to this letter.To see what they wrote, please

Press ← and → on your keyboard to move between letters

Write new comment

Load more comments