A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Want na aedutp. . . I ot ma, xlsapenua fccipeis eb ,iended ue,qre. Rufegi or ,lewl 4 oreanth bniynnaor to shtonm as out 5 nad otok ughoht taht. ,neo hoairpue igve nwe dregne irstf a em o,nw mean a wen uercenndebum ehav dan meit nad sltiegn ttha ,sfher hte i for atlcau rousponn.
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Het asw emusrm. . . Lalf oot ,lnog saw the adn. Mcae ot nhte eht eliv ot turenr netiw,r mtie tesnrap ym hwti nda for dna. . . Dit'dn i. Tou aemc eftl eekw no mhet, etmh fo sllca ranifct tcstnano cnpia rtieh a a i dan to fo le,erif ofmr rush nad tnhe dne. Easflru nad me depe, epcxet adn depe to sntninidedgsrmau. Msoe ,cmpoayn sfainfocgut ustkc stniead so, bmesrme dn'itd nda iyflma rtnreu pneds onudf to whit to rteih tnhosm veil rt,eeh i itwh. S'it eebn llvoey adn.
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Mya too, sa htoer clyesert vahe yuo gahdenc xteeedcp aevh hsitng. Twees in a rnhtsacii mi,)dn twha frtfsoe my i wsa mi' aprt oevl ekep hcwhi orf tniaschir ogs'd srdheat uothhg( ot a si npraste of ryoeanm royu my ton od creatpaiep. Engsadrte i hwen im' t,eshdif i sgtinh urgothlyho reve ylsem,f tahn deoevlped, adn ve(ne nda yppha) anym ,eb wtha ot sdeu bnee ifnd ni nda htta sec,a aevh haev tno ewihl any mrfo i who arihppe isllt.
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Sywa elufpoh i'm smoe ofr etfuu,r teh in. A sspesmiicti abuto lsoa epho eth of sa tplean and the nda ehwol uxaions. D,scroes r?hgit seingrf.
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Oy,u iaioladtvn egninsd to ym edar v,eol ckba nda aaecnectcp,.

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