A letter from February 10th, 2018

Dear FutureMe, How are you? I bet, you are doing great now! (hopefully) As of February 10, 2018 you are a/an: -Over-all Operations Supervisor at Mindanao Autosales Group, Inc. -Leader of Intercessors' Team Yes Chad, you are too busy at the time then. You often complain for your 5-6 hours sleeping nights on training in the Judea Apartment. You cried up to God at that time because you still don't have any Bible Study contact. Your personal ministry is soooo dying because you don't have enough time for evangelism and follow up since you are just a newly appointed supervisor (hey, busy life). You are being teased for your baby belly fats. I think you around 68Kgs. You are being bullied for being who you are (not really, haha!), as in , they called you Lingin-hoo (Lee Min Hoo). You don't have any Gov't Valid IDs, no SSS, no PhilHealth, no formal long-sleeve attires, etc...(but you are trying to own these things, aja!). Your posts in facebook are half face (literally, due to your "no-right-angle shoot" insecurities). You meet Ms. T. and you are quite upset (without Ms. T knowing it) because you always remember someone in the past on behalf of her presence. You don't have time for love life. I mean, hey Chad, you are still immature that time and you are still in the process of adjusting in the Apartment Training Set-up, professional development, life's burdens, etc. Needless to say, you are hurting inside...you felt like a robot. That's how God shaped you as of that moment through the burdens you felt, for you to achieve the next level of maturity. Trust me, you felt like you are being entrusted of a greater work. Well, that is the brief personal life of you as of February 10, 2018. But how about today? Are you still the supervisor or did you change your career or do you still have any work? Do you have Bible Study Contacts? Are they growing? Do you still lead the Intercessors' Team? Are you still in the LA Ministry? Do you still wake up at 4:00AM? I want to ask these questions because your life revolves around these activities at that time. Remember Chad, you are not a robot. You are free in almost everything. But somehow, you must not also be an indolent. I know you. If things are boring and repetitive, your self production declines. Why Chad, why are you like that? Please change that. I hope you are leading Cell Group with Cell Leaders, I hope you are mature and growing. Chad, this is my hope for you that you will always remember your place (kabalo ka sa imong position!). People come and go. You may get hurt hardly but don't give up. Surrender it to God. Do you have savings? The last time I check, your savings at your passbook is 2,627.79 in BCB. Too big right? haha. Anyway, as long as you just help Mama and your siblings (and give always your whole tithes), it doesn't matter if you don't have any savings. Do you have a love life? Arggh! Nevermind. You are almost 27 now but I know you don't have any serious boy-girl relationships. I know it, right? Me so bully with myself! haha. Do you own a car? Or still you are processing to release others' cars. I think the future Chad is so ambitious. I can feel it. Just correct me if I am wrong. (Am I talking as an Old Chad as of February 2018 or as a New Chad of 2021? This phrase is quite confusing mehh! haha) Actually, I don't have any message for "my future self". Just always bear in mind that your life verse is: "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. Exodus 14:14" Chad, you had been in failure in the past for not following God's steps and will, this is my prayer that you really can't forget how painful it is to be isolated in the Lord. The world is constantly deceiving you and wanting to snatch you out of God's hands. So, if you are out in God's hands today, please do not hesitate to come back to Him. Just repent! Do not let your emotions over rule you. And do not let your pride and guilt surpassed the good thing you have done in the past and the good thing God had showered you. You are always loved even though you might feel the other thing, okay? Old Chad view: In all seriousness aside, I praise God that you are able to read this but if you don't, we (old and new Chad) praise God for this kind of life. -Chad Ayop :)